The rise of synthol

There are two types of drug abuse: the scary kind, and the really scary kind. Synthol users fall victim to the latter. A drug which is becoming increasingly popular with bodybuilders, synthol is a kind of injectable fat, used to “correct” lagging body parts, giving the impression of a larger muscle mass as it’s absorbed into the body.

It was first concocted by American bodybuilder guru Chris Clark in the 90s, when he was looking for a way to bulk up muscles that responded poorly to training, and it’s been destroying people’s bodies ever since. Clark ended up in hospital after inadvertently poisoning himself with one of the early stage mixes, but apparently that didn’t deter him and synthol is now about as easy to get hold of as cannabis.

On some forums the muscles built up with synthol are labelled “dirty muscle”, which is pretty apt. If the oils don’t absorb into the body the muscle tissue reject it, and the oil becomes encapsulated inside the skin, often in the form of painful cysts. If these aren’t treated in time the muscle tissue is broken apart and immobility becomes a very real threat. Koert tells me that in the worst cases, “there are so many cysts in the muscle that physicians cannot remove them all. They have to amputate part of the muscle.” These guys are having their arms hacked off because there’s nothing left in them but fats and puss.

The thing is, synthol is “the lazy man’s drug” because unlike anabolics, which only work in tandem to a rigorous program of training and diet, synthol just makes muscles appear bigger by bulking them up. Koert is passionate about the difference: “Steroids give you more contracting, real muscle tissue. Synthol muscles are just meat, filled with oil. If you visit bodybuilding boards, you will only find hostility towards synthol users.”

That might be true, but there are some fanatics out there. In the depths of one forum a user posts “The thing about S is it’s unnoticeable, so you can even everything out, perfect symmetry scores big points at pro level,” whilst another comments, “Synt freaks are the best kind, using for a year and no side effects so far!” Good for you, mentalist.

But there’s a far more disturbing issue here than whether or not pumping your arms up is ethically viable or not. Dr Harrison Pope, who was featured in the 2012 documentary The Truth About Steroids, thinks a disease he calls “bigorexia” is sweeping the community. He believes many bodybuilders suffer from muscle dismorphia, and are truly unable to gage how big they are. As a result they resort to increasingly desperate measures to get bigger.

This sounds not too different from the ten of thousands of anorexics, bulimics and body dismorphics out there, fucking up their bodies because lasting damage seems a small price to pay for physical perfection. Perhaps the worst thing about synthol isn’t its ethics, or its side effects, but what it suggests about the standards we set for ourselves.

We live in a society where our beauty ideals increasingly seem to lie outside of what the human body is actual capable of achieving. Until we start celebrating women and men of all different shapes and sizes, drugs like synthol will continue to wreak havoc on not only our muscles, but our minds.

4 Ways to Get Freaking Huge

Time To Get Swole
Man, do I have some magical, mystical, muscle building advice for you today. But I know – you’re extremely skeptical. You’re waiting for the bullcrap; to be let down by some cool sounding training system with overly complicated mumbo jumbo, and exercises that suck.
Sorry, no fail for you today.

I don’t hand out fail. I’m not pushing an agenda. You want to get big fast, then do the following.

1 – Stay with a Simple Routine
Listen, you have been searching for the ultimate routine for years. In fact, you spend more time reading about routines then performing routines. And each week you switch routines. I’ve found it, this week I’m making the change to blah, blah, blah and will grow!
Fail!
Enough with this foolishness. I’m about to carpet bomb your fantasies, so you have been warned. Brace yourself. Here goes…it doesn’t matter what routine you use. Yes, you heard me right. Doggcrapp, Max Stim, Dogg Stim, Max Crapp…whatever. Just pick something and stick with it. And make sure the routine isn’t complicated. You don’t need complicated.
A simple routine focuses on progression of weight using basic heavy compound lifts including:

• Squats
• Deadlifts
• Bench Press
• A form of the Overhead Press
• E. T. C.

If you find that your routine has you doing giant sets, drop sets, or focusing on the dreaded mind-muscle connection, run like the wind. And worse yet, if it contains too many isolation movements…well…FAIL. You don’t need training techniques or isolation movements, you need to:

2 – Lift Heavy Ass Weights

Lift heavy ass weight. Heavy ass weight makes muscles grow. Heavy ass weight can be in any rep range, because it is heavy ass weight and is kicking your balls seven ways to Sunday.
What rep range should I use? FAIL! It doesn’t matter – Lift heavy ass weights!
What should my rep speed be? FAIL! It doesn’t matter – Lift heavy ass weights!
Should I do cable crossovers before or after flyes, and should incline bench be performed with a 22 degree angle, or a 24 degree angle? FAIL! It doesn’t matter – Lift heavy ass weights!
What split is the most effective for mass? FAIL! FAIL! FAIL!
GO LIFT HEAVY ASS WEIGHTS!
But I don’t want to lift heavy! So and so says that squats are bad for your knees, and my mom is afraid and wants me to take up knitting.
Both so and so, and your mom (no offense to moms) can barely lift a roll of toilet paper to wipe their own asses. If you want to look like your mom, listen to the training advice of your mom. If you want to pack on muscle, lift heavy ass weight!
The end!

3 – Stop Bitching and Get Your Ass to the Gym!

I’m tired.
My toe hurts.
My right nut seems small today, maybe I shouldn’t train.
Want to know how to fail? I mean epic fail? Continue to make excuses, and avoid going to the gym. Want to know how to succeed? Gird up your balls, shut the hell up, and get your ass to the gym, 52 weeks a year. The end.
This isn’t complicated.
Of course your left nut hurts! You’re lifting weights. Lifting heavy ass weights will hurt from time to time. Pain is part of the equation. We aren’t collecting bottle caps here, Charles.

4 – Forget Your Damned Abs and Eat!

I want a six pack!
Bud, if you think you can pack on muscle and carve out a six pack in the same month, you need to lay off the crack pipe.
This just in…if you want muscle, you need to eat big. If you want to be a 220 mass monster, but only weigh 120, you need to start eating like you weigh 220 pounds.
How long should I bulk before I cut? FAIL! Eat until people at the gym start asking you where you get your steroids from. Then, and only then can you start cutting.
Should my bulk be dirty or clean? FAIL! Grab a shovel and get to gettin’.
Whole milk has fat! Almonds have fat! I can’t eat fat! FAIL! Listen, drinking whole milk and lifting heavy ass weights equals muscle mass.

Final Thoughts

• Lift heavy ass weight using heavy ass compound lifts.
• Eat big.
• Never miss a workout.
• Stick with a basic routine.

Follow these 4 rules for two years and you will dramatically change your body. The end.

Synthol - How Big is Big Enough!

This compound is a perfect example of the extremes that some bodybuilders will go to be the "biggest". Not content to have 20 or 22-inch arms, bodybuilders found a way to push the limits up to the 27-inch barrier. Yes you read correctly there are freaks walking around now sporting thigh-sized arms from their shoulders!

Synthol has its origins in the 1980's when a drug called Esiclene was all the rage. For those who missed the 1980's, Esiclene, was not used to build muscle mass like traditional steroids but instead was used as a quick fix to bring up weak bodyparts before a contest. The drug acted primarily by causing a localized swelling. Bodybuilders found it very useful in bringing up such small muscles as the calves, rear shoulders, and arms. The only drawbacks were that Esiclene was very painful to use and very short-lived.

In the mid 1990's a researcher took the next logical step and invented an oil-based compound that could be injected directly into the muscle.
The initial name he chose was Synthol, but he later learned that this was already registered and trademarked by a pharmaceutical company. So he renamed his product Pump N' Pose, but as with steroid trade names the first name stuck. It has now reached the point that Synthol is as well known as such bodybuilding compounds as creatine, Dianabol, and whey protein.

Chemically the drug is composed of 85% medium-chain triglyceride oils (a fatty acid), 7.5% lidocaine (painkiller), and benzyl alcohol. The oil is injected straight into the muscle where it becomes trapped between the muscle fibers. With each injection, a larger volume of oil builds up, and the muscle swells up just like a balloon. It is estimated that about 30% of what is injected is broken down by the body while the remaining 70% breaks down slowly over three to five years. Users report incredible muscle pumps during training, but this could be a result of the extra pressure generated by the trapped oil.

Is it safe?

Although some bodybuilders consider Pump & Pose relatively safe to use, there are numerous health issues to consider. Injecting any amount of fatty-acid material intramuscularly can be dangerous. This is compounded by the fact that most bodybuilders have any medical training. It's very easy to hit a major nerve and if you do hit one by accident you can easily cause permanent paralysis of muscle fibers in that area.

The repeated injections cause other problems. As bodybuilders have discovered from long-term steroid use, sticking a needle into the same are results in the build up of painful scar tissue that may require surgery to remove. And it gets worse. Should you inject into a vein or artery by mistake the fatty acids could be carried to the lungs and cause a pulmonary embolism. They may also reach the heart and induce a heart attack. They might even make it to the brain and lead to stroke. As you might guess all three cases are potentially fatal. Oh and did we mention that if you strike a larger artery such as the femoral artery you could bleed to death in minutes!